"comparison is the thief of Joy"

Knowing me I will start writing this, Get a whole paragraph written and then give up. Trust me. I have started a new blog at least 4-5 times. But then I get quite bored and quit. Just like most of you have quit reading this boring blog already ;0) For those of you who are still reading, this is what has been going on...............

So yeah. I got a job! Starting In August im going to be watching Stephanie and Ryan Burks baby girl. Im really excited. Ive been praying for a job like this and God provided. I never thought he wouldnt though. The cool thing is that Its only 4 days a week and the baby will be 7 months when she starts and tyler will be 10 months. so thats pretty close. They will have a lot of fun playing together. Im really excited. If anyone needs a babysitter until then let me know. Im still looking for jobs until August. Thanks guys!

I signed up for a personal trainer at Gold Gym. I wasn't planning on it, but I talked them down in price like crazy. I figured that if I'm not going to push myself then I'm going to pay someone else to. And Its been good. I meet with my trainer, Sara, 3-4 times a week. Well, I try at least. She is great to. I really like her. We have a lot in common and know a lot of the same people. She is very easy to talk to and she pushes me past what I believe my limit to be. So yeah, I'm always sore. But that's her job right? I'm enjoying it and dreading it at the same time. Its nice to have an awesome trainer to. It feels like I'm just meeting up with a friend to work out..except they tell me what to do. lol

Tyler is getting big. Goodness, the child is almost six months old! I cant believe it. Its sad to me because I know he wont be a baby forever. Then again its exciting because he is changing everyday and accomplishing new things . The cool thing about being a mom (or dad) is that your children never cease to amaze you. I think that even when Tyler is 30 years old im still going to look at the things he does and think he is a freakin genius. ;0) I never want that feeling to go away. Its funny how the little things are just so exciting. He develops new laughs, new crys, and new facial expressions everyday. Its very exciting to watch him grow and learn new things. I just love him.

lets talk about the office and how great it is that the show is finally back on. Jason and I couldn't be happier. Here are some of my favorite quotes from last nights episode. They are not that funny if you don't watch the show..just thought I would add that.

1. Kelly- "If I created a website with this many problems I would kill myself"

Ryan- "do you have a question Kelly"

Kelly- "yeah, I have a lot of questions. Number one.....How dare you."

I loved that conversation.

2. Micheal- "Wow, this place is packed"

Dwight- "Fire Hazard"

ha.

3. Dwight - "If I'm dead, you guys have been dead for weeks"

4. Dwight- "Maybe you have a bladder infection. I'll order you some cranberry juice" (on Ryan going to the bathroom to do drugs all the time....I'm assuming he has a drug problem)

Last but not least. I'm sure we all remember this moment

5. Toby- " I have an announcement....to make...I am moving to Costa Rica. Thought about it for a long time...now I'm finally gonna do it. So I'm just gonna hop the fence and job home now."

lol..nice

Like I said. If you don't watch the show and understand the characters, then those quotes wont mean much to ya.

So I don't really know what else to write. My life is exciting to me right now. But im not sure how many are interested. lol so I will just end this with some pictures. love you all!

I LOVE when his little hat falls sideways. My little man..lolOne of my aunts got Tyler this cute blowup bathtub. Its a little duck and it actually quacks. He loves it.
Lol, My brother in law got Tyler a bouncer . He wasn't to fond of it at first but now he loves it!
The bible study and worship night at Aimys was pretty awesome. I'm attempting to make fun of my friend Meagan but I just made myself look like an idiot..lol nice.Tyler LOVES jimmy. And Jimmy pretty much tries to kidnap him whenever he gets the chance. Who here actually thinks They can wait a couple years to have a kid? Not Me!

Yeah..This is pretty crazy right? Well, we are a little crazy. Jason really needed a hair cut. Gotta love him though.

My best friends Stephanie and Tanya..Love that my best friends are also family. woo hoo.. Don't ask about my face. I don't know whats going on there.

Chris, My other Best friend playing guitar for Tyler. He loves it. He's used to Jason playing all the time.

This picture here pretty much explain the person chris is..He is a crack up.

What?

"he exposed the sophisticated intellectual opposition to objective being and objective value for the naked folly that it was. "

Ummm. what? seriously guys. If you only had to read that sentence once and had full understanding of it then you are a freaking genius. Or maybe I should just go back to school. Who knows. Listen John Piper. If for some odd reason you decide to go on the Internet and read Ashley Hyltons Blog and see this.... Do you think you could maybe lay of the thesaurus?

I really want to read this book that the church gave us. Its called Don't Waste your life. I started reading it and it has great stories and outlook on things. But Let me tell you. I have never googled so many words in my life! You know the sentence above? that is how 90% of the book is. The other 10% that I can understand is great. But it would be wonderful if I could understand the rest of it. I know that writing should be creative, but if people cant understand it because it is to complex, then whats the point. Im not questioning your integrity Mr. Piper. Because the truth is, I might be the only person that cant understand what the heck you are talking about. And for my blogger friends. If you know what he is talking about. Don't tell me. just make me feel better and tell me you are just as confused as I am.

On that note. I will continue to read this book ..and Try to understand it to the best of my ability. but I'm not promising anything.

"existentialism was the air we breathed"

I have to admit. Existentialism was probably the first word I googled as I read this book. I learned that this meant "existence precedes essence." first you exist and then , by existing you create your own purpose, or meaning to life as opposed to deities or authorities creating it for you. I guess I learn something new everyday right?

anyway, he talked about Bob Dylans song Blowin in the Wind. (which is the first song Mrs. Elder taught me on guitar) "how many times must a man look up before he can see the sky?" He said "you may look up ten thousand times and say you don't see it. But that has absolutely no effect on its objective existence. It is there. And one day you will see it."

when I read this I instantly thought of Philippians 2:9-11.
"God has given him a name which is above every name – that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, of things in heaven, and things in earth, and things under the earth; and that every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord"


I know that for most of you that is a common verse. To be honest I have heard it a millions times over and I have to admit that It never really hit me until now. I seriously cannot wait for that day. Have you ever pictured what it will be like? (alright. stop singing I can only imagine!) Imagine everyone, and I mean everyone, on their knees worshiping God at the same time. I think of Hume Lake, and how moved I am to see everyone with hands in the air worshiping God together. . Its a wonderful feeling to be surrounded by others that Love God like that . Take that feeling and multiply it by...I don't know, a million? I don't even think that is enough. I just know its going to be amazing and it will never go away. Not when you have an eternity in Heaven.

So, I'm sorry if that was a boring blog. I feel like a new christian that is hearing these amazing things for the first time. A part of me is sad about that, but happy that im finally getting somewhere. Im still learning, I guess we should never really stop learning right?

between you and God.

BETWEEN YOU AND GOD
People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered. Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives. Be kind anyway.
If you are successful you will win some false friends and true enemies. Succeed anyway.
If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you. Be honest and frank anyway.
What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight. Build anyway.
If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous. Be happy anyway.
The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow. Do good anyway.
Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough. Give the world the best you’ve got anyway.
You see, in the end, it is between you and God; it was never between you and them anyway.
–Mother Teresa

This is seriously amazing. I want to know your thoughts on this. I think She is right. It is between myself and God. And he knows my true motives, he knows the truth about everything and in the end it only matters what God thinks. He knows the truth, so therefor im not going to worry about it anymore. Being worried and holding back will only push me away from God. And having a relationship with him means more to me then anything. Even if that means I have to lose some..

Now on to my question that has nothing to really do about that.

When I pray for something over and over and over again does that mean I lack faith? Im serious. I really dont know the answer. Having Faith means "having complete confidence in a person or plan." So when I continually pray for certain things does that mean I dont have faith that God will help me with it? I feel like I do, but why do I pray the same thing over and over? If you have an answer please let me know.

Matthew 6:7-8 says:
But when you pray, do not use vain repetitions as the heathens do. For they think that they will be heard for their many words. Therefore do not be like them. For your Father knows the things you have need of before you ask Him.

I came across this and it confused me. So im just interested in what you guys think. I could be taking this whole verse the wrong way. sometimes I fail to see the real meaning in what im reading. I think we all do that though sometimes. That's why I think Fellowship is so important for us. The past week I have been talking to my friend about some things that are going on and its crazy how they can bust out a verse, that before they explained it to me, had no relevance to my situation. I love when God reveals things to people like that. Its like singing the same song at church every sunday and it really doesn't mean anything to you. But then the next Sunday you sing it and it hits you more then ever and all of the sudden it has meaning. That's how the bible has been for me lately. I really need to read my bible more. I lack so badly in that department. But its getting better. So you guys can pray for me k. That I can have a better understanding of Gods word and that I keep up the bible reading.

ps. My Easter update will be up in a few days! woo hoo. ;0)

Enough is enough

To all my friends who have one..Update your stinkin blog. seriously. you guys are lagging. love ya though!

pictures!

Hey everyone!! We got Tylers pictures done last week and they turned out great! you might have seen some from Myspace already. Anyway, Bethany Armsheimer took them with the help of her sister melany Klink. I hope I spelled those names right! Anyway, If you want bethanys information so she can do your pictures just let me know. she is amazing you guys!! Well, here are some of my favorites. enjoy!

oh nalgene bottle. how I love you

I think my blog was to long last time and it scared people away. So this one shall be shorter..maybe.

Tyler got his 4 months shots yesterday. Poor guy. His little legs got red and sore and he pretty much screamed for the rest of the day. I felt so bad. There was nothing I could do about it except give him some baby meds and hope it helped. He is much better today. Thank God. I don't think I could handle that for another day.

We tied our softball game yesterday. The girls did great on hitting and pretty good of fielding. The other team tied with us after our catcher and picture decided to not pay attention and help a girl that got hit with the ball. while they were trying to help this girl (who wasn't even hurt) the other team had 2 runners on the bases that ran to home with out us even trying to get them out. Did that make sense? A little confusing. All in all. The girls and the coaches had a great time. And that's all that matters. They are awesome girls. I'm so happy to be their coach.

I went to the gym last night after the game. It was cool, except I was by myself and that kind of sucked. I usually have my awesome cousin Tan with me or my sisters. It was fine though because I was able to think about a lot of things without distraction. Have you ever tried praying while on the treadmill? It kept me going. I think I was paying so much attention to praying and thinking about life in general, that I doubled my usual time. That was pretty cool. so yeah, last night was good. The only thing that bugs me is that no matter how much I push myself Im never sore the next day.. So maybe im not pushing myself hard enough? Its annoying. As far as weight loss goes, I haven't lost much since the last time I weighed. But im also building a bit of muscle. I have lost another inch though, and that's pretty exciting. Does anyone on here go to Golds?

As for my life in general, I couldn't be happier. I have Jesus. Who is just amazing. He will never leave me, or let me down. And I love that. I have my awesome husband Jason who loves and provides for this family like you wouldn't believe. I married my best friend. Isn't that the way it should be :0) And I have my baby Tyler. He can make me smile in the worst of times. I love him. I cant believe that he has only been here for 4 months. I feel like I have loved him since the day I was born. And of course, My family and friends. I love you too. That's a lot of love right there. And of course, I end this blog with some pictures. I hope it wasn't to long!

one day at a time.

I just thought I would share that Tyler had rice cereal for the first time. It was hilarious. I have a video and I will post it when Tanya sends it to me. Poor guy, he hated it!!

So the 27th was Jasons 24th birthday. what an old man! ;0) I spent the day looking for running shoes, size 14. I went to 6 different places! Poor Tyler was not very happy about that. Anyway, that's what he wanted. He has been running almost everyday in his regular shoes and I cant imagine that being very comfortable. I'm really proud of him though. last time he checked he lost 17 lbs. so he is doing good. Why do men lose weight so fast? I work my butt of and only lose a couple pounds. Oh well, slow but surely I guess.

So there are some new life changes going on right now. It was really hard in the beginning and there was a lot of drama about it. I'm sure people got hurt by it because I know it hurts me.. But its getting easier. I've prayed a ton about it and I really feel like its where God is leading me. So I know its the right thing. So there is a Jeremy Camp song that really means a lot to me. I could take it verse by verse and relate it to my life right now. So you can read it or not. its up to you. Its in color. so Just pass it by if you don't want to read it.

One day at a time I will walk this road I've traveled so far

One day at a time well I know I will carry on

One day at a time I can see you took my life this far

One day at a time I will take this faith along

All this hope I breathe is given by the hand that carries meUntil I'm complete

and I'll take all I will To understand this plan you have for me, for me

I've been shut up shut down held out held down

In ways I never knew I would But I can feel your fullness in my life

Well I've been burned out broken torn out torn down

In ways I never knew I would

But I can feel your fullness in my life

one day at a time

one day at a time

I will take these words you've given me

One day at a time I will rest in knowing you

One day at a time I will share this gift you've given me

One day at a time I will walk these valleys through

And all I know is that I see

How much my heart is longing to be cradled by your side

Yeah, I'll give all I can

To one day soon be held by your hand, by your hand

In all these things I will press on, yeah

I'll be with you I know it won't be long

so you can see where what im getting right? Things change in life all the time. Its easier for some people, and for others its heart wrenching. I just happen to be the second person. Change is not easy for me. especially when it means losing people who mean the world to me. But just like the song says. " one day at a time, I will rest in knowing you" That's the great thing about God. He will ALWAYS be there. and I have complete faith in that. And its true. I will Take all he has to give me until I understand the plan he has for me. Only because I know its way better then mine. Even if I never understand it, I know its better. Anyway, I feel good about life right now. And let me tell you, that is a great feeling. There are some things that still need to be dealt with, but I know that God will give me the right words to speak and understanding to handle these situations. At least I pray that he will.

On to the weight loss. Ive lost a total of 25 lbs. Tan, my sisters and I have been going to the gym a lot lately. Its been nice. I cant wait until Tyler is 5-6 months, then I can take him to the day care there and work out. Then I will try to go about 6 times a week. So there ya go. That's about it on that. I will keep ya updated though.

shout outs!

Tanyanator- thank you for being my amazing best friend. I know you will always be here for me, just like I will ALWAYS be here for you. Thank you for being here for me in this weird time. I love you!

Mr. Shaw- Thank you for your funny blogs. they bring humor to my life. now update it! oh yeah, any news on the treadmill? Tell your dad I will give him money for it if he wants to get rid of it.

Jenn- It was great having frozen yogurt with you other day! Don't worry about being a cat lady. Cats can be pretty amazing. Oh yeah, Ive been praying for your medical stuff. I hope everything is alright!

Crisha- Congrats on winning your "case" lol. remind me not to mess with you ;0) anyway, I love you and thank you for being a great friend to me. lets hang out soon!

MANDI!!- Im so glad we are talking again! its been way to long. Cant wait to see you when you get in to town. I miss you!

Steph- Im glad you are back and away from crazy people. You dont fit in there. Thank you for being my work out buddy and letting me coach softball with you. I love you sister!

sorry if you didnt get a shout out. Im tired and I could go on forever!! I love you though. Here are some random pictures. enjoy!

This is the softball team that My sister stephanie and I are coaching. Its so much fun and the girls are great. We have our first game of the season tomorrow at 8am. wish us luck!!

steph and Tyler. I love this picture.

My beautiful sisters. sorry if ive already put this picture up.

Thats all. sorry if this was to long for ya. trust me, I could write a novel right now. I will just save it for the next post.

My valentine

I had a really good valentines day. My sisters are angels and watched Tyler for us. As much as I love and adore the little guy, Its nice to go out just the two of us. So Jason and I went to SLO and had dinner at firestone grill. It was sooo good! we wanted to walk around farmers market but we took to long at dinner. Thats ok though. we just walked around town and got some ice cream. Then we went to pismo bowl to do some bowling but they closed. So we went to the billiards and played pool. It was really fun. We didnt really spend a lot of money and it was still alot of fun. MR SHAW! I really liked your blog on the 5 love languages. That book is so silly but so amazing at the same time. Jason and I REALLY learned alot from it. We read it before we got married and it changed us so much for the good. So I recommend it to anyone dating, engaged or even married. Once you get passed the silliness its really good.

.............................................................look at the concentration!

.......................................................................I WON!

Well. I just thought that I should update you all on my weight loss. Yesterday I went to Costco and got myself a really nice scale. I say nice only because is showed that I have lost a total of 20 lbs. Thats pretty good for only having a moderate activity level. Im pretty excited though because Jason has decided to join me with the weight loss. He wants to lose 30-40 lbs before kickback. Which is around September. I know he can do it. the Guy can jog everyday for about 4 days and I can tell a difference. why cant women be like that? oh well. Im excited for him. We will both feel so much better after we lose some weight.. So ive decided to start setting goals for myself. I think that will help motivate me to work harder. So this week I want to lose 4 lbs. I think that will be easy. All I have to do is start exercising. So yeah, wish me luck!

Tyler will be getting dedicated on the 24th at church. So for those who want to go that dont already attend Grace let me know..Or just show up. Service is at 9am. Crisha is letting us barrow this amazing little outfit. Its so cute on him. we wanted to do it this sunday, but since there is an abundance of babies in the church they have to split it up between two sundays. Im excited for it though. Having Tyler grow up in a christian home is a big deal to me. I want him to know and have a relationship with God. And I want him to look at Jason and I and know that we are going to Heaven when we pass. I really want to be a good example for him. I think its cool that the church promises to be there as an example for him to. It really does mean a lot to me. So yeah, I would to see you all there if you want to go!

I love him so much! Im blessed with an awesome baby!

This is the face he makes when he is concentrating on something. right now he is looking at my sister phone.

I love having a happy baby. its a lot of fun.

All he wants to do is walk around. Im pretty sure he will be walking early.

Oh yeah, thankyou again for everyone who is keeping me accountable and asking me how I am doing. Its really helping!